Our good friends at Sittercity realize that navigating the sitter/parent relationship can be tricky for both sides.¬† Below are a few common topics and what you can do to smooth things over.
1. Please come home (and leave) on time
If you tell your sitter you‚Äôll be home around 10, do your best to be home around 10. Even if your sitter doesn‚Äôt have much to do because the kids are asleep by then, she might have plans afterward that are derailed if she doesn‚Äôt know when to expect you home.¬† Likewise, if you tell your sitter to arrive by a certain time but aren‚Äôt ready to go just yet, keep in mind that she is still on the clock. Though you might not need her help just yet because you‚Äôre running behind schedule, respect her time and pay her for the same window of time you hired her for.
2. Compliments go a long way
Just like any job, knowing how much you are valued and appreciated can make a huge difference. If you were really impressed with an activity your sitter did with your children or were amazed that she actually got them to eat their vegetables, let her know that you appreciate her hard work.
3. Your kids are my top priority ‚Äî not your laundry
Unless you‚Äôre paying them extra, your sitter is not there to do non-kid chores like walk the dog or load a week‚Äôs worth of dirty plates into the dishwasher. You want your sitter to be spending quality time with your children, and it‚Äôs hard to do that if you‚Äôve also left them a to-do list of miscellaneous tasks.
Of course your sitter is responsible for cleaning up any messes that happened on her watch. If you return home to scattered toys and dirty dishes that weren‚Äôt there when you left, let her know that you‚Äôd like her and the kids to clean up after themselves next time.
4. Let me know ahead of time if the kids are sick
There‚Äôs a good chance that if your kids are sick, your sitter might catch the same bug while she‚Äôs on the job. Don‚Äôt blindside her when she shows up for work with a coughing sneezing child. Give her a heads up, and let her decide if she‚Äôs comfortable sitting for a sick kid. It can go either way ‚Äî some sitters don‚Äôt mind at all, and some would rather forgo the income and stay home.
Likewise, you should let sitters know if you don‚Äôt feel comfortable if they show up sick.
5. The kids will only respect my authority if you do
If the kids know that mom or dad will revert a sitter‚Äôs disciplinary decision when they get home, then they won‚Äôt respect the sitter‚Äôs authority. This can make the sitter‚Äôs job difficult ‚Äî and the kids might not finish their homework or get to bed on time if they don‚Äôt think what the sitter says goes.
Discipline can be tricky because you and your sitter may have different methods. It helps if you establish ground rules beforehand. Be clear about how you discipline and what potential issues might come up. Make sure everyone‚Äôs on the same page before you head out the door, and it‚Äôll be smoother sailing while you‚Äôre gone and when you return home.
6. Just let me know if something comes up
Sitters know that things out of your control can pop up ‚Äî there might be traffic that keeps you longer, or the event you thought would last all night might end early.
If your plans change or fall through, let your sitter know with a quick text or call. Keep her in the loop as soon as you know so she knows when to expect you home and can plan accordingly.
7. Keep me informed on major events
Particularly in military life, there may be unique circumstances that you should be thinking about when it comes to your sitter. It is important to educate your sitter on any family changes in as it can effect the way the children respond to her.
- Is your family going through a deployment?
- Inform your sitter that the military member is not there.
- Provide background on the length of time they‚Äôve been gone.
- How many times they have they deployed in the past? Is this the first time?
- Is the child having coping issues?
- How should the sitter respond if the child begins to ask questions regarding the deployed parent?
- Should the sitter expect a call (Skype, FaceTime, etc) from the deployed parent?
- Is there a special doll/book/tradition that you would like the sitter to be aware of?
- Have you had a recent PCS?
- Inform your sitter that you are in a new community and home.
- Is the child having trouble adjusting?
- Is this the first time you‚Äôve left them since being in your new home?
- Do they need homework help?
- Is there an upcoming PCS?
- Inform your sitter that if you are moving soon, and if the children know.
- Is the child having trouble adjusting to the idea of moving?